Maybe when I am already abroad for study, my mind will wander back to my hometown.
Maybe I would think, back there in my hometown,
I would try to wake up at 7 every holiday, yet I am too lazy to do so. So I would curl back into my blanket after turning off my alarm and think, this is happiness.
I would go downstairs to find the whole dining table is filled with toasts, cakes, cereals for my breakfast and think, this is happiness.
I would sit in front of my room's desk, turning on the AC. I would find that I have no homework at all (even if I do, I won't do it anyway), so I turn on my laptop and start to write stories and think, this is happiness.
I would walk around the fabric department store, clutching my bag tightly, afraid of those pickpockets. But when the grumpy auntie in the sewing counter smiles at me because I’m a regular, I would think, this is happiness.
I would sweat and sigh a lot when I sew. I would stay up really late sewing a dress or anything. But when it's finished, I would stare at it like there's no tomorrow, smile and think, this is happiness.
I would drive my car and look out from my car's window to find pollution is extremely heavy outside. But I am inside my car, with music I love turned on, even though seems so near, but I am far from the outside world. I would think, I am so privileged, and this is happiness.
I would drive my car and find it really hard to park the car all by myself. But that's when the parking guy shows up and helps you by shouting direction from outside. Where in the world I can find something like this if it's not in Indonesia? I would think, this is happiness.
I would loathe Indonesia's traffic jam so much. I hate it with my heart. But when I have my friends inside the car, making jokes and chatting around happily, I would think, this is happiness.
I would go and hang out with my best friends at night, going to places we've never been before. We would laugh and joke around and not giving any damn of what others think. I would be so happy and think, this is happiness.
I would be happy to sacrifice my sleep time to chat with my best friends through late night calls. Even though before I rang their number I was crying, but I was definitely smiling when I ended them. I would think, this is happiness.
I would eat together with my brother's family every Sunday. I would laugh at how my parents smiled at their grandchild, and think, this is happiness.
I would hate myself once in a while, on how others are just plain luckier than myself. But I would realize that I am too lucky when my servants came to ask what would I have for dinner. I would reply them kindly and think, this is happiness.
I would be so uncomfortable on how I am a minority. But when I show up for my extra Japanese courses I take, and how people don’t look at you by what kind of skin color you have, and how I am treated kindly even though I am outside my circle, I would think, this is happiness.
There are so many things in Indonesia that I hate. But I’ve come to realize that there are always some kind of happiness that I had from those things, and I certainly will miss them when I’m not here anymore.